January 24th, 2009

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Saturday, January 24th, 2009

Happy weekend, everyone!

Although to me, every day is a weekend ’cause I’m not working (as we were talking about earlier, Rachel, the one benefit to not working).  Unfortunately, there’s this thing called money and you don’t get much of that when you’re not working so it’s really not an ideal situation, persay.

Anyway, not too much going on here.  I woke up a little earlier today, at 11:30 AM!!  Yesterday was the worst….4:30 PM…yup, you read it right…4:30 PM! How ridiculous is that?  I always feel guilty and ashamed when I do that.  I keep asking myself:  “Why, Julie?!!  How hard is it to get up and get something accomplished?”  I wonder if the answer is that I don’t have to be up for anything unless I have an appointment (well, and I do have morning and early afternoon meds to take—getting up late screws everything up!!).  Or could it be because no one is home, and I know I won’t be motivated to be efficient if I’m sitting in the house alone, not that far from my comfy bed.

Anyway, I’m disappointed in myself, so I have to turn this whole sleeping thing around.  I am not getting enough done around here!  I’m incredibly behind on e-mails and now facebook responses, and there should be no reason for that!!  How was it that I feel like I accomplished so much more in Seattle?  Again, I harken (I love that word :) ) back to the apartment, and the fact that it was such a nice, organized space for my mom and me…tiny and manageable, so I guess my tasks seemed more manageable.  Whatever my problemo is, I need to get out of this lazy bum routine and do stuff around the house, finish unpacking, stop lazing on the couch and drying my eyes out staring at the TV.  Could it be a form of depression?  I don’t know…I don’t feel depressed all the time, but I know doctors are constantly playing with the dosage of anti-depressants. My Lexapro dosage hasn’t changed since before I left for Seattle, but maybe it’s something I need to ask my doctor next week.  The whole point of them is to help you get through an obstacle or challenge in your life, right?–maybe my levels are off again so we need to change it…we’ll see.  I’m certainly not one to keep adding meds to try and feel better, but whatever tool I can use to help me feel more like myself, I will use if the doctors believe it necessary.

OK, enough blabbing on about that!!!  I’m sitting here on the couch with my pups, Guinny on my left and Jamie on my right.  Jameson’s snoring, and it’s so cute!  Yah, it’s much cuter when dogs snore…people, not so cute!!  I remember a train ride home from France with Ronnie (not to Virginia, obviously :) )…when I say home, I mean Spain where I was staying for a semester.  Anywayyyy, it was a sleeper car and it was all squished up, so Ronnie wasn’t too happy about that since he’s so tall, but even more bothersome was the snoring man in the bunk above me.  I lightly pushed his bed with my feet several times, and Ronnie told me to stop, but hey!–I couldn’t sleep–why should he?  I just thought subconsciously he would feel the bed moving and would stop snoring, but no…it was a futile attempt.  We arrived in Spain tired and pissed off, but don’t worry, the trip turned out OK!!  (except for when I got sick and puked all over the cobblestones of Sevilla!  Ronnie tried to shield me from onlookers, but it was a little hard.  I was a pretty good sister though—even though I felt sick, I still took him on a boat ride on the Guadalquivir AND on a horse and buggy ride…no wonder I got sick, huh?  I was a mess…then I cried ’cause I was sick and he was there visiting me and I didn’t want to be sick….honestly, I was a sad sight).

Anyway, I went a little off subject there, but I figure you’re used to that by now.  Let’s see…I’m back to trying to read a little bit each night because it always relaxes me before bed.  RIght now, I’m reading “Teacher Man” by Frank McCourt…it’s good, a little slow-going sometimes, but still very interesting.  It reminds me why I don’t think I could ever teach!  It’s a job that I highly respect, but it scares me.  If you’re not an amazing, fascinating and cool leader, the students will tear you apart!  McCourt sounds like he was kind of a “Mr. Hills” of New York.  Mr. Hills was my very best teacher, even above Julian Bond (he’s the head of the NAACP and an awesome teacher).  Mr. Hills taught history in high school, and he told it like a story.  Everything seemed so real and so, I don’t know, historical!! I think of him often and how many lives he touched in his years of teaching.  I will never, ever forget him, and I’m pretty sure that’s how all his students felt.  By the way, I did love all of my Spanish teachers, as well, but it’s hard to make Spanish class like a story…you have to follow all the rules, learn all the grammar, so by nature it just can’t always be fun!!  (although, Laurel, somehow you do it when you teach Spanish and Aunt Ellie, you do it with English!)  I’m very proud to have two wonderful teachers in my family.

I’m so cozy here between the pups that I’m tempted to just sit on this couch all night and write!!  hahahahaha  don’t worry…I won’t!

All is well here.  Ronnie and Kathy came up tonight, Katie’s coming tomorrow, and I’ll see Laura on Sunday…not bad, huh?  Yup, I have a pretty special family…always making the effort to come over to the house to spend some time.

Believe it or not, I’m now yawning….but it is 1:45 AM…I thought I was going to bed early tonight!  Oh well. I’ll try to find some good stuff that warrants pictures for you!  I know you miss those.  :)

Take care all and enjoy your weekend!!

Love,

Julie