August 31st, 2009

...now browsing by day

 

Monday, August 31st, 2009

I know, two posts in one day…aren’t you just beside yourself with excitement?!!  :)  I was just thinking.  Sometimes I do that, you know.  I was thinking about my upcoming trip to Seattle (we leave in three weeks!) and remembering my four and a half months spent there last year.  I can appreciate how strange this may sound to all of you, but I believe I just realized that those four and a half months will represent one of the happiest times of my life.

Although there were days that went by in a blur, days when I could only think of the next opportunity to lie down, I mostly remember enjoying my mom’s company (and now I’m crying thinking of how much she did for me and how special she made my stay).  I remember everyone’s visits, I remember how homey our apartment felt, I remember admiring the Seattle cityscape while watching every episode of “Frasier”…what a great purchase those DVDs were!  I remember the clinic and how safe I felt.  I remember our trusty rental car that made life so much easier (despite that damn Pete Gross House garage!).  I recall delicious restaurants, breathtaking views, dogs galore, REI, yummy coffee, QFC, beautiful flowers, seaplanes, Mount Rainier, evergreens, Route 5, hills aplenty, my South Lake Union neighborhood.

Am I the same person who left VA only a year ago, planning to make the best of it, but predicting a bleak several months?  I’m already feeling sad to leave Seattle, and I’m not even there yet.  How’s that for surprising?  I’m a little bit nervous about experiencing the city as a tourist.  It felt so satisfying to leave in January and think “we’ve made this city ours”.  And part of me will be a little jealous not to have my mom to myself.  Although we always had visitors, it was essentially the two of us navigating the city streets and the clinic halls.

I am sure that this visit will bring new adventures and memories, but I will always recall those four and a half months with my mom as the ultimate Seattle experience.  As anyone does who longs for the past, I would like to go back and try and make each moment more memorable…try to express to my mom and my family exactly how much they mean to me and how fun they made the experience…to tell my friends and family just how uplifting their visits were, to remind myself just how special the little moments were each day I spent with my mom.  I think she knew how I felt, even when she listened to me complaining about her driving.  :)

I’m sitting here now with a pile of Kleenex beside me, remembering, and wishing I could turn back time and spend several more weeks or months exploring with my mom.  But the beauty of nostalgia is that it represents the past, and the mere feeling of it is pleasant in and of itself.  Something that already seems perfect shouldn’t be altered, and our time out there was indeed perfect.  I looked up some quotes on “nostalgia” to see if there were any good ones and I thought you’d like these two:

“There’s a certain nostalgia and romance in a place you left.”  ~David Guterson

“Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.” ~Peter De Vries

hahaha…that second one cracks me up!  And the first one, well, I think I’ve aptly described the nostalgia and romance I feel for Seattle.  I am so lucky to be able to feel that way considering the circumstances.  Who knew a city could stir up so many strong emotions?  I feel like I should be writing Seattle a love letter.  :)  And I think I’ll sign it “Lots of love from an honorary Seattleite”.

Love to all of you too,

Julie